Am I spreading myself too thin? I'm starting to wonder. I know none of you can answer this for me, but it's something I've been thinking about and will need to put some conscious effort into deciding how I want to divvy up my free time. So far, here's what will be on my plate beginning in a couple of weeks:
-Growth groups on Tuesday nights, Thursday nights, and Saturday mornings. I'm co-leading the Sat. morning group, the Tuesday group is a book study so that will require reading, and the Thursday group is crochet so that will require practice.
-volunteering for EastLake on the connection card entry team and the food/coffee table. The cards are every Sunday and food/coffee is about every other Sunday.
-volunteering for greyhound rescue by attending adoption events 1-2 times per month
-I currently run ebay auctions for the greyhound rescue and update their twitter page
-Michael takes Penny to doggie 'good citizen' class on Wednesdays, which means I'm at home without a car (we just have one and share it)
-I am trying to start a healthy routine of getting more exercise, which means ideally I would like to get to the gym 3-4 times per week
What I am internally debating about is whether we should add becoming adoption volunteers for the greyhound rescue. This would be pretty time consuming, I think...it's reviewing applications, having a phone interview with a prospective adopter, conducting a home visit, and helping place greyhounds from our program. I have no doubt it would be extremely rewarding. I'm just wondering if it will be putting too much on my plate for the moment. I need to make a decision soon because training is on the 23rd of October and I want to give the person doing the training enough notice if we decide not to do it. A home visit on the MO side, for example, would eat up a chunk of a day by the time it would take to drive there, conduct the visit, and drive back. Probably one of the only downsides of living in Lawrence is that the majority of the events with the group are in the Overland Park side of KS or KCMO. So it's a drive pretty much no matter what, which is fine, but I need to keep that in mind while thinking about all of this. So at the moment, the only times we could conduct home visits would be Friday nights (Mondays are our date nights), Saturday afternoons, or Sunday afternoons. And Sunday afternoons won't really work because Michael has basketball growth group at 4.
Hmm. The more I type it out and think about it, the more I'm seeing how much time I don't have left. And the time that I do have is pretty sacred as far as making sure I get enough time for exercise, friends, seeing Michael, and recharging for work. Maybe I'll revisit adoption rep training in 2011.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Sleeeeeep.
I wish I could get myself back on a normal sleep schedule. It's 2 am and I'm wide awake. It would be nice to fall asleep around 11ish when Michael goes to bed. I always feel like I'm disturbing him when I do head back. I've always been a night owl. I tend to do a lot of work at night because I just feel more alert than I do early in the morning. I still remember the ability to be awake and perky by 8 am when I was still in NC was mostly a daily challenge. I thank God for the blessing of being able to work from home, so that even when I'm groggy, no one has to see that. Hooray for being 2 minutes from the Dunkin Donuts in town for an iced vanilla latte when I do have to be functioning before 10 am.
Let's talk Glee, shall we? I was not knocked off of my feet by this episode, although I did love Heather Morris (Brittany). Glad she was finally given a chance to be in the spotlight other than her hilarious one liners. They did mention that they grew up with Britney's music, which is true for me. Her first single came out when I was in 8th or 9th grade and I remember watching it on TRL and being hooked. Of course, we all know how crazy she got as the years progressed, but there's still that little piece of me that has a soft spot for her. If you want to read a hilarious commentary of Glee episodes, I highly, HIGHLY recommend you check out projectrungay.blogspot.com. They usually have clips of all the songs in addition to a summary and their opinions on the episodes.
Let's talk Glee, shall we? I was not knocked off of my feet by this episode, although I did love Heather Morris (Brittany). Glad she was finally given a chance to be in the spotlight other than her hilarious one liners. They did mention that they grew up with Britney's music, which is true for me. Her first single came out when I was in 8th or 9th grade and I remember watching it on TRL and being hooked. Of course, we all know how crazy she got as the years progressed, but there's still that little piece of me that has a soft spot for her. If you want to read a hilarious commentary of Glee episodes, I highly, HIGHLY recommend you check out projectrungay.blogspot.com. They usually have clips of all the songs in addition to a summary and their opinions on the episodes.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
I once was blind, but now I see
EastLake's pastor, Matt, uses this familiar line quite a bit to talk about how we can respond when people question different facets of Christianity. It's a fact that none of us will know the answer to every single question, because we're all human and not walking encyclopedias (unless you're Sheldon Cooper, that is). Especially for people like me who are relatively new in their faith. I can't quote a ton of scripture, and to be honest, I don't really want to. That's not what my relationship with God is about. It's personal, doesn't use Christian-ese, because I know that God hears me and takes me as I am, and is willing to listen any way I want to talk to him. Sometimes it's like, "yo God, just wanting to say hi and thank you for helping the Chiefs start out 3-0." We're tight like that.
The bible verse in question is about a blind man Jesus comes across while walking with his disciples. They ask Jesus who sinned in order for the man to be born blind. Jesus said neither his parents nor the man himself sinned, but that he was born that way so that God could work through him. He then basically takes spit and mud and rubs it in the man's eyes (lovely, right?) and tells the man to wash his face. When he does, he can see. When he is questioned by the Pharisees, he doesn't know how Jesus was able to perform this miracle. All he knows is, "I was blind, but now I see."
Anyway. So when people ask hard questions, it's totally okay to say, "I don't know." The answer is out there, somewhere, and we can find it out if the answer to that particular question is a serious road block for that person. But what I can say is this: "Look, I'm just as messed up as the next person. But what I know is that I once was blind, but now I see." I once went through life in the dark, feeling alone, but God was there the whole time and I just didn't know it. But now I see Him, and guess what? He's always been there and always will be, even through the times that are so hard it's almost unbearable.
One year ago I would have laughed at myself for being this excited about my faith. One year ago, talking openly about how Jesus has changed my life would have made me uncomfortable. One year ago, I certainly could not imagine being a part of a church family that so willingly says, "no matter what you've done, there is a place for you here," a church that I am pumped up to attend, volunteer for, and stay connected. I have to miss the October 10th service because we'll be out of town, and I'm really bummed to miss it- NO WAY would I have said that one year ago.
But one year ago things were different. One year ago my mom was still here, so weak she had to quit her job because of the chemo, but still here. Funny how grief can change you. I've struggled with so many emotions these past 6 months...anger, depression, fear, sadness, jealousy of all the other people who still have their moms. Remorse that she'll never get to meet her future grandchildren. She would have been an AWESOME grandma. I still feel emotional pain for my Dad, who is now widowed at 53 after 31 years with his best friend, for my grandma and aunt who lost their daughter and sister, and for my sister and I. I'm 25 and one parent, the woman who brought me into this world, who was always there for me and loved me no matter what I did, is gone, and that reality is hard to swallow. Something I didn't count on, but found anyway, was healing through God.
Matt read the blog entry I wrote after I attended membership class as part of his sermon today on going all in. I heard lots of sniffles in the audience. I didn't cry, but I did tear up. Sue said my hands were shaking. I'm so glad Matt read it, though...he delivered it exactly the way it sounded in my head as I was writing it. I'm sure I would have been a blubbering mess if I'd tried to read it. So thanks, Matt (if you read this), for reading my story about how God is using EastLake and the people there to guide me out of a depression that threatened to take over. I'm not saying I have it all together now. Far from it. I still have days where I miss her so much it hurts to breathe. But now I have a relationship with God that's meaningful, and I can talk to him (and mom) and know that He's listening, and will help me get through the messes of my life. And if that story can help anyone else who's going through some crap in their lives...man, how awesome that would be.
So to anyone out there who's skeptical, thinking that you've been burned so many times in the past by the Church...I understand. But I promise you, I am a normal person whose life has been changed because of this church. So come check it out next Sunday at 9:30 or 11 am at South Jr High in Lawrence. I'll be at the food table and would love to meet you.
I'm sharing this in hopes it reaches someone still in the dark, someone waiting for something to change their life, because for me, it all boils down to this: because once I was blind, and now...I see.
The bible verse in question is about a blind man Jesus comes across while walking with his disciples. They ask Jesus who sinned in order for the man to be born blind. Jesus said neither his parents nor the man himself sinned, but that he was born that way so that God could work through him. He then basically takes spit and mud and rubs it in the man's eyes (lovely, right?) and tells the man to wash his face. When he does, he can see. When he is questioned by the Pharisees, he doesn't know how Jesus was able to perform this miracle. All he knows is, "I was blind, but now I see."
Anyway. So when people ask hard questions, it's totally okay to say, "I don't know." The answer is out there, somewhere, and we can find it out if the answer to that particular question is a serious road block for that person. But what I can say is this: "Look, I'm just as messed up as the next person. But what I know is that I once was blind, but now I see." I once went through life in the dark, feeling alone, but God was there the whole time and I just didn't know it. But now I see Him, and guess what? He's always been there and always will be, even through the times that are so hard it's almost unbearable.
One year ago I would have laughed at myself for being this excited about my faith. One year ago, talking openly about how Jesus has changed my life would have made me uncomfortable. One year ago, I certainly could not imagine being a part of a church family that so willingly says, "no matter what you've done, there is a place for you here," a church that I am pumped up to attend, volunteer for, and stay connected. I have to miss the October 10th service because we'll be out of town, and I'm really bummed to miss it- NO WAY would I have said that one year ago.
But one year ago things were different. One year ago my mom was still here, so weak she had to quit her job because of the chemo, but still here. Funny how grief can change you. I've struggled with so many emotions these past 6 months...anger, depression, fear, sadness, jealousy of all the other people who still have their moms. Remorse that she'll never get to meet her future grandchildren. She would have been an AWESOME grandma. I still feel emotional pain for my Dad, who is now widowed at 53 after 31 years with his best friend, for my grandma and aunt who lost their daughter and sister, and for my sister and I. I'm 25 and one parent, the woman who brought me into this world, who was always there for me and loved me no matter what I did, is gone, and that reality is hard to swallow. Something I didn't count on, but found anyway, was healing through God.
Matt read the blog entry I wrote after I attended membership class as part of his sermon today on going all in. I heard lots of sniffles in the audience. I didn't cry, but I did tear up. Sue said my hands were shaking. I'm so glad Matt read it, though...he delivered it exactly the way it sounded in my head as I was writing it. I'm sure I would have been a blubbering mess if I'd tried to read it. So thanks, Matt (if you read this), for reading my story about how God is using EastLake and the people there to guide me out of a depression that threatened to take over. I'm not saying I have it all together now. Far from it. I still have days where I miss her so much it hurts to breathe. But now I have a relationship with God that's meaningful, and I can talk to him (and mom) and know that He's listening, and will help me get through the messes of my life. And if that story can help anyone else who's going through some crap in their lives...man, how awesome that would be.
So to anyone out there who's skeptical, thinking that you've been burned so many times in the past by the Church...I understand. But I promise you, I am a normal person whose life has been changed because of this church. So come check it out next Sunday at 9:30 or 11 am at South Jr High in Lawrence. I'll be at the food table and would love to meet you.
I'm sharing this in hopes it reaches someone still in the dark, someone waiting for something to change their life, because for me, it all boils down to this: because once I was blind, and now...I see.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Happy days
This might seem silly to some of you, but a big reason why today was an awesome day was because GLEE is back on tv. Love, love, love that show. I think it's hilarious, doesn't take itself too seriously, and it is just plain fun to bust out in a song every 10 minutes or so. Puts a huge smile on my face. I signed up for a growth group on Tuesday nights, so once October rolls around I'm going to have to stay off the internet until I get home so I don't get spoiled by Facebook, twitter, etc. GLEE is very quotable so I'm sure I would see some stuff from episodes within an hour of it airing live.
In addition to GLEE, Michael and I also watch Castle, Caprica, Fringe, and The Big Bang Theory. I recorded The Biggest Loser, Hawaii Five 0, and The Event. Jury is still out on The Event...I thought it was intriguing so I will watch it again to see how it progresses. People are comparing it to LOST, which I loved and was frustrated by at the same time because with each question that was answered, 5 more would pop up. I know it's a lot of tv, but thankfully the dvr records most of it so we're still able to be out and about as we want to be. Our fall nights will be pretty busy...I have growth groups on Tuesday and Thursday, and Michael has doggie 'good citizen' class with Penny on Wednesdays. Not complaining though, I love hanging out with EastLakers!
Speaking of groups, Tish and I have 6 sign ups so far for our group. Soooo exciting!! We're doing a dog walking group on Saturday mornings and even though I am not a morning person, I hope it will be fun. I'd rather eat breakfast out than walk but that is a habit I need to break, haha.
My other group is going to be teaching me how to crochet. I can't wait to learn. I am not really a crafty person so I'm sure it will be challenging at first but I am up for it. I already have a list of things to make for family: a potholder for dad, and scarves for Michael and Lyndsay.
Tonight my Dad called asking for some advice. A family friend had sent an invite to a baby shower for her niece (the daughter of the lady who used to babysit me when I was little), addressed to my mom. Which means their family doesn't know she passed away. Talk about awkward. That is a really, really tough phone call to make. I know my dad will be okay doing it when he is ready, but it still sucks so have to make those calls. Time is slowly making each day a bit easier but...I don't know. Then these little things happen and it's a reminder of how much our lives have changed since March. Whoever you are, if you are reading this and your mom is still alive, give her a call or pay her a visit whenever you can. I would give practically anything for one more day of shopping, going to Starbucks, going to church, sending a funny email to my mom...those little things I just counted on to be there for a lot longer than I got.
In addition to GLEE, Michael and I also watch Castle, Caprica, Fringe, and The Big Bang Theory. I recorded The Biggest Loser, Hawaii Five 0, and The Event. Jury is still out on The Event...I thought it was intriguing so I will watch it again to see how it progresses. People are comparing it to LOST, which I loved and was frustrated by at the same time because with each question that was answered, 5 more would pop up. I know it's a lot of tv, but thankfully the dvr records most of it so we're still able to be out and about as we want to be. Our fall nights will be pretty busy...I have growth groups on Tuesday and Thursday, and Michael has doggie 'good citizen' class with Penny on Wednesdays. Not complaining though, I love hanging out with EastLakers!
Speaking of groups, Tish and I have 6 sign ups so far for our group. Soooo exciting!! We're doing a dog walking group on Saturday mornings and even though I am not a morning person, I hope it will be fun. I'd rather eat breakfast out than walk but that is a habit I need to break, haha.
My other group is going to be teaching me how to crochet. I can't wait to learn. I am not really a crafty person so I'm sure it will be challenging at first but I am up for it. I already have a list of things to make for family: a potholder for dad, and scarves for Michael and Lyndsay.
Tonight my Dad called asking for some advice. A family friend had sent an invite to a baby shower for her niece (the daughter of the lady who used to babysit me when I was little), addressed to my mom. Which means their family doesn't know she passed away. Talk about awkward. That is a really, really tough phone call to make. I know my dad will be okay doing it when he is ready, but it still sucks so have to make those calls. Time is slowly making each day a bit easier but...I don't know. Then these little things happen and it's a reminder of how much our lives have changed since March. Whoever you are, if you are reading this and your mom is still alive, give her a call or pay her a visit whenever you can. I would give practically anything for one more day of shopping, going to Starbucks, going to church, sending a funny email to my mom...those little things I just counted on to be there for a lot longer than I got.
Friday, September 17, 2010
weekend!
Man, I love weekends. Because I work from home, sometimes they are my opportunity to get OUT of the house! How's that for a change? ;) Tomorrow Michael and I are taking a trip to Overland Park so he can be fitted for a tux. He's going to be in his friend Zack's wedding (he has to wear a kilt! Glee!) and we are pushing it with getting them in on time. While we're in OP we'll drop off some squeaky toys that I auctioned off on ebay on behalf of MoKan Greyhounds. I'll be putting some more stuff up tomorrow night so check back, I'll have the links. All the money goes to the greyhounds looking for their forever homes. :)
Speaking of greyhounds, Penny's brother will be visiting us next week. We are dogsitting him Thurs-Sun and I am sooo excited! I'm positive pictures will happen. She starts her doggy 'good citizen' class the week after that.
So much to look forward to. Now if only the weather would cool off a bit so I can wear the jackets and sweaters I purchased...
Speaking of greyhounds, Penny's brother will be visiting us next week. We are dogsitting him Thurs-Sun and I am sooo excited! I'm positive pictures will happen. She starts her doggy 'good citizen' class the week after that.
So much to look forward to. Now if only the weather would cool off a bit so I can wear the jackets and sweaters I purchased...
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
10 on Tuesday
Random set of 10 questions, yay! Might start searching around for these types of things when I don't have anything in particular going on.
1. Do you have an innie or an outie?
I’m the owner of an innie.
2. What kind of milkshake do you order?
Eh. I have to really be in the mood for one…mostly strawberry when that urge hits, though.
3. How often do you repeat outfits at work?
Haha. I work from home where nobody can see me so my pj’s are a weekly thing. Please don’t ever show up at my house on a weekday without calling unless you’re ready for a fright when it comes to my wardrobe. Give me at least 10 min. I say this with love.
4. What are your feelings about thank you notes?
I think they’re a highly necessary part of life. I don’t mind writing them and I like to receive them. I will admit to shooting the side eye after not receiving one after a certain amount of time.
5. Do you like spicy food?
I like a little kick every now and then but my version of spicy is probably laughable for most people. I also have acid reflux that tends to get in the way of enjoying truly spicy foods.
6. How many toilet paper squares do you use?
Uh, I’m not sure I’ve ever really counted that before.
7. Were you in Girl Scouts?
Yes, until around 6th grade. I was a brownie and a junior. Peer pressure got to me…I stopped because none of my friends were in it anymore and it was no longer a cool thing to do.
8. Notebooks/Journals: College ruled? Wide Ruled? No lines? Spiral Bound? Plain front? Decorative?
I have to have college ruled; wide ruled makes me feel like I’m writing on a billboard. In sixth grade I really loved Lisa Frank decorations but now I barely use notebooks so it doesn't matter.
9. Do you snack throughout the day? What do you pack for snacks?
Sometimes. If I do, I try to have fruit as a snack. I lurrrrve strawberries. Other fave snacks are an apple with a bit of peanut butter or triscuits with a slice of sharp cheddar. If I’m craving something sweet I really like 2 squares of Lindt’s dark chocolate with sea salt. YUM. I learned quickly that 100 cal packs and the like don’t stick with me and I have to eat more of them in order to get the hunger monster (stomach) to chill.
10. What is your favorite month? Why?
Probably October. It’s my anniversary month, my dad’s birthday, my hubby’s birthday, Halloween, the true arrival of fall, cooler weather, going to a pumpkin patch, carving pumpkins, costume parties, dressing up Penny (that is so happening this year), football, and the holiday season (and my own birthday) are just around the corner. This October will be extra special because I’m getting baptized. ☺
1. Do you have an innie or an outie?
I’m the owner of an innie.
2. What kind of milkshake do you order?
Eh. I have to really be in the mood for one…mostly strawberry when that urge hits, though.
3. How often do you repeat outfits at work?
Haha. I work from home where nobody can see me so my pj’s are a weekly thing. Please don’t ever show up at my house on a weekday without calling unless you’re ready for a fright when it comes to my wardrobe. Give me at least 10 min. I say this with love.
4. What are your feelings about thank you notes?
I think they’re a highly necessary part of life. I don’t mind writing them and I like to receive them. I will admit to shooting the side eye after not receiving one after a certain amount of time.
5. Do you like spicy food?
I like a little kick every now and then but my version of spicy is probably laughable for most people. I also have acid reflux that tends to get in the way of enjoying truly spicy foods.
6. How many toilet paper squares do you use?
Uh, I’m not sure I’ve ever really counted that before.
7. Were you in Girl Scouts?
Yes, until around 6th grade. I was a brownie and a junior. Peer pressure got to me…I stopped because none of my friends were in it anymore and it was no longer a cool thing to do.
8. Notebooks/Journals: College ruled? Wide Ruled? No lines? Spiral Bound? Plain front? Decorative?
I have to have college ruled; wide ruled makes me feel like I’m writing on a billboard. In sixth grade I really loved Lisa Frank decorations but now I barely use notebooks so it doesn't matter.
9. Do you snack throughout the day? What do you pack for snacks?
Sometimes. If I do, I try to have fruit as a snack. I lurrrrve strawberries. Other fave snacks are an apple with a bit of peanut butter or triscuits with a slice of sharp cheddar. If I’m craving something sweet I really like 2 squares of Lindt’s dark chocolate with sea salt. YUM. I learned quickly that 100 cal packs and the like don’t stick with me and I have to eat more of them in order to get the hunger monster (stomach) to chill.
10. What is your favorite month? Why?
Probably October. It’s my anniversary month, my dad’s birthday, my hubby’s birthday, Halloween, the true arrival of fall, cooler weather, going to a pumpkin patch, carving pumpkins, costume parties, dressing up Penny (that is so happening this year), football, and the holiday season (and my own birthday) are just around the corner. This October will be extra special because I’m getting baptized. ☺
Monday, September 13, 2010
update :)
Long time no talk...busy week I guess. Labor Day was a nice break with Michael. We didn't do too much but it was good to have some down time. :) This weekend we went to a fundraiser for the greyhound adoption group. It was fun! There were games for the dogs, lots of shopping, a silent auction, a live auction, and tons of sweet doggies to play with. We won a silent auction that contained doggie soap, shampoo, "refresher mist" spray, a towel and mitt, plaque off (a supplement to add to food to reduce plaque and tartar), dermapaw, and ear cleaner. I think we are set on dog supplies for a while! Michael won a live auction that included a charcoal grill, 4 camping chairs, a spice set from Gates BBQ, and a gift set from Jack Stack BBQ. We will probably put the charcoal grill up on craigs list since we already have one, we mainly wanted the chairs and spices. Tonight for dinner he used the spice rub, a Penzey's english prime rib rub, and a little bit of Gates bbq sauce on some sirloin steak and it was amazing. Soooo good! Lots of leftovers for tomorrow, too. :) I have to remember to take it easy when it comes to my ankle...4-5 hours on my feet put me out of commission for the rest of the night. Which was okay, since it was spent re-watching the pilot of Battlestar Galactica. I'm not a huge sci-fi person but that show was amazing.
In other exciting, kind of scary news, my friend T and I are going to be co-leading a growth group. We met last week to talk about what we wanted it to be. Part of me is like, what the heck have you gotten yourself into??? I swear on the inside I'm an introvert, but EastLake seems to ignore that and pull me out of my shell, which is a good thing! But most of me is really excited about it. It's a walking group that going to meet on Saturday mornings. We'll probably go to a different place each week, like KU's campus, Prairie Park, downtown Mass, etc. People can bring their dogs and I hope it will be a good way to start the weekends...good friends, a little movement, maybe some coffee afterwards...just overall a good time. That's the goal, anyway. :)
In other exciting, kind of scary news, my friend T and I are going to be co-leading a growth group. We met last week to talk about what we wanted it to be. Part of me is like, what the heck have you gotten yourself into??? I swear on the inside I'm an introvert, but EastLake seems to ignore that and pull me out of my shell, which is a good thing! But most of me is really excited about it. It's a walking group that going to meet on Saturday mornings. We'll probably go to a different place each week, like KU's campus, Prairie Park, downtown Mass, etc. People can bring their dogs and I hope it will be a good way to start the weekends...good friends, a little movement, maybe some coffee afterwards...just overall a good time. That's the goal, anyway. :)
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